There is apparently one job requirement for running the official Highmark Stadium account: hate the fans.
Have a complaint about the new stadium? Get mocked.
Ask a question about something you were told before spending a pile of money on seats? Congratulations, you’ve just become material for the stadium account’s open-mic night.
Who the hell thinks this is a good way to talk to customers?
I don’t know who is running the Highmark Stadium account, but somebody apparently decided the official social media voice for a brand-new stadium should be some sarcastic fucking reply guy who thinks every legitimate fan complaint is an invitation to dunk on the person asking it.
And this isn’t just me getting mad because an account made a joke. I love stupid jokes. Half this website is stupid jokes. But there is a gigantic difference between some random Bills fan with 212 followers being an asshole on Twitter and an account representing the stadium doing it to the people who are buying tickets, PSLs, parking, concessions and everything else that comes with going to an NFL game.
Especially when the fans might actually have a point.
Take Bottlegate.
I’d love to tell you exactly what this Channel 2 article says, but their website has more pop-ups than a 2003 porn site and somehow managed to crash Chrome. At this point, getting through a WGRZ story feels like beating a level of Contra.
But the basic issue is pretty simple. Fans were apparently told one thing about water stations and bringing bottles into the new stadium, and now they’re finding out something different. You can bring Bills horns into the stadium, but forget about an empty water bottle.
It certainly sounds like the fine folks at Legends may have been fibbing a little bit about those water stations.
And yes, I know some super-sicko stadium fan is going to jump into my mentions screaming, “THAT’S HOW IT IS AT OTHER NFL STADIUMS.”
Fine.
That isn’t really the point.
If somebody from Legends or the Bills told people something while they were deciding whether to spend thousands of dollars on seats, and now the policy is different, people have every right to ask about it.
Now, I will say this is also a pretty odd conversation to have with your ticket rep. Who the hell starts asking about drinking water at a football stadium? I’m asking about sightlines, parking and whether my seat is underneath somebody’s armpit, not the hydration infrastructure.
Still, if somebody asked and was given an answer, you can’t suddenly act like they’re an idiot for remembering the answer.
What I really don’t understand is how purses are allowed and Bills Elvis can apparently bring a guitar into the stadium, but an empty bottle is where security draws the line.
Is it because the Bills don’t sell guitars inside, but they do sell bottles of water?
That’s where an official stadium account could actually be useful. Explain the rule, why it exists, and If somebody received incorrect information, say that. If the policy changed, acknowledge it.
Instead, we’ve apparently decided the best strategy is Stadium Twitter: Roast Edition.
What’s next?
Are the Sabres going to start an official KeyBank Center account where they just tell fans to fuck off every time somebody has a complaint?
“Your seat doesn’t have a cup holder? Use your fucking hand.”
“The Aud Club closed? Sorry, your mom got caught giving a hand job in there.”
“Bathroom line too long? Should’ve pissed before the game.”
Is this really where we’re going with official team and stadium accounts? Because there’s a difference between being funny and having some personality on social media and basically turning your customer-service account into a 16-year-old reply guy who just discovered sarcasm.
And that’s what drives me nuts about this account.
Remember when Ted Black took over the Sabres?
There were a million complaints about that organization. The game presentation sucked, Fans complained about broadcasts, Alumni relationships needed work, the arena needed improvements, and there were issues everywhere.
Black didn’t respond by hiding behind a logo and making sarcastic jokes at everybody.
He went out and talked to people.
He addressed the issues, he listened, and He wasn’t a dick about it. He came across like somebody who actually understood that if people are spending their money and investing their time in your product, maybe you should hear them out instead of trying to win a fucking Twitter argument.
And slowly, things changed.
We’re getting cup holders in the bathrooms. The 40th anniversary celebration goes from feeling like another cash grab to basically, “Fuck it, invite every former Sabres player we can find.” The Sabres bloggers wanted access…here’s one of Ted Black’s pizza parties and some press passes!
That’s how you address issues.
You don’t have to agree with every fan. Fans are fucking nuts. I’m one of them.
Some complaints are stupid.
Some people complain just because they enjoy complaining.
But when you’re representing the stadium, you don’t need to win the argument. You need to answer the question.
That seems to be completely lost here.
And the funniest part is the Bills should understand this better than almost anyone. This fanbase has spent years being sold on how special it is. Bills Mafia, best fans in football, family, community, Home-field advantage.
Great.
Then don’t treat those same people like idiots when they ask why something they were told about their expensive new stadium suddenly doesn’t appear to be true.
I’m sure the stand-up comedian running the stadium account will eventually deliver a killer line like:
“Fans are encouraged to stay hydrated by using our drink fountain or drinking the tears of Patriots fans for free.”
Maybe throw in a crying-laughing emoji.
That’ll fix everything.
And somehow the dumbest part of Bottlegate might not even be the bottle policy.
It might be the account assigned to explain it.
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